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A Pause, for These Special Announcements

Today, I have no tales for you. Only announcements. And an audio-visual presentation.

Those of you who choose to skip the AV show can sit quietly with your heads on your desks. See if I care.

First, I haven’t cross-talked here for a while about the Zolton Does Amazon series I write over on ZuG.com, but with yesterday’s edition — Terms of Enbeerment, for the brave among you — the series has turned precisely one year old. There are over 100 live Amazon reviews attached to the pieces, mostly positive Amazon shopper feedback, a few bewildered comments and some of the scariest pictures you’ll see this side of a Bavarian bikini zombie flick trailer.

(Coincidentally, since first mentioning the series here back in February, I’ve made exactly 100 posts here as well. It’s like circles within circles or something. Eerie.)

“No, you can’t have that minute of your life back. And yes, I really do own twelve thousand striped rugbies.”

Speaking of trailers, I also mentioned (back in May) that my old comedic friends Jenn and Andrea invited me to play a part in their latest short film project. I also said — and I have it in pixels and white, right here — that if the short were ever to become available online, I’d link over to it posthaste.

The short is not available online. Not yet.

But the trailer for the short — yes, a trailer, because these people are serious, yo — is now on YouTube. And also, right here. Please cast your peepers onto the teaser for Viral Video:

No, you can’t have that minute of your life back. And yes, I really do own twelve thousand striped rugbies.

(And the dress shirt and tie you can see briefly at the 0:35 mark. Wanna see more of that hot action? Stay tuned for the full film, after it’s been laughed out of a few local film festivals.

“Laughed out” good, or “laughed out” bad, I have no idea. Only time and my natty wardrobe will tell.)

While we’re at it, this seems like a good time to remind you that the hilarious essay collection Mug of Woe (co-edited by Jenn, as well) will be hitting shelves — read: Amazon virtual shelving facsimiles — next week. Have a gander at the Foreword for more details and pulse-racing excitement.

(I believe my contribution is in the ‘Woefully Awkward’ section. Probably, at least, if ninety percent of my waking life is anything to go by.)

And that’s about it for the announcements. The cafeteria will be serving those nasty cardboard pizza squares and a vegetable medley, and don’t forget your dioramas depicting the development of the Cyrillic alphabet in 10th century Bulgaria for the Terminally Obscure Social Studies Fair. Pleasant day, children!