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Charlie Hatton
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I'm on a bit of a hiatus right now, but only to work on other projects -- one incredibly exciting example being the newly-released kids' science book series Things That Make You Go Yuck!
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What’s Next, Dammit? Pager Spam?

You know, I never quite thought I’d say this, but sometimes, the best part of blogging is MT-Blacklist. I mean, sure, I dig the writing, and I love getting comments… but not the kind that those assmagnet comment spammers leave. So, the little program that keeps most of ’em out of my archives is my best friend some days.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with this bit of code and others like it, MT-Blacklist checks incoming comments against a set of filters, and kicks out any that it doesn’t like for some reason. Like if the comment contains the URL ‘’, for instance. Or ‘’. Just for example.

Now, many of you who blog yourselves know how pesky these comments can be. No… no, wait. ‘Pesky’ isn’t quite the word I was looking for. They’re not so much ‘pesky’ as… what’s the term? ‘Rage-raising’? ‘Bile-building’, maybe? ‘Wedgie-worthy’? Yeah. That’s the one. Wedgie-worthy. Wedgie-worthy comments from a bunch of blog-spamming bitch monkeys. Sweet.

So, sometimes after a hard day of work, it’s awfully nice to come home, check out the activity log on the site, and see that a bunch of these asstards got blacklist-bitchslapped the hell off this site. I know it won’t actually stop them or anything — they’ll just ooze their slimy shit over someone else’s site, instead. Hell, all that peenie-pill commenting nonsense is probably automated; I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that the bastards don’t even notice when they get shut out like a pimply debate team freshman at the junior prom. Still, I feel better, and that’s all that really matters. To me, anyway. Color me selfish.

Anyway, today was a good day for fighting the comment clowns. One of the slippery little hamslappers slipped through the defenses, but MT-Blacklist has an answer for that sort of shenanigans — right from the comment email, you can delete the damned thing and inoculate yourself against the same crap from ever showing up again. It’s a scourge-scrubber, that’s what it is.

(And no, I’m not being paid by the company to sponsor their product.

Come to think of it, I’m not sure there is a company. Heh.)

So the cool thing today was, after giving that rogue comment the boot of my ass out the door, it seems that our ‘sperm spam’ friend kept at it — there were another dozen or so blocked comments from the same IP address. And later, three more from another pill-peddling pantywaist. Three in, and three emphatically out. Yeah, mother fucker. Suck that through a straw, bubby. Get your groove on, Blacklist! Aw, hell yeah!

Permalink  |  4 Comments

4 Responses to “What’s Next, Dammit? Pager Spam?”

  1. Lady says:

    Bitch monkeys, I think that may replace fucktards as my new word of the week. I know what you mean about the spam, I made the guys a whole post where they could spam away on, but did they? Hell no.

  2. Frac says:

    You know Haloscan has a much less invasive solution… they block search engines from indexing their comments.

    Yes, that means comments won’t show up in search engines… but it also means that Haloscan comments become useless to spammers. They do it to increase their pagerank, afterall.

    I’ve never got a spam comment in Haloscan, and Haloscan doesn’t have any sort of filtering.

  3. shelley says:

    Lordy, I hate showoffs with Haloscan.

  4. Frac says:

    Showoff? Not sure what that means. I wasn’t pushing haloscan, I was actually wondering out-loud why MT doesn’t just add a robots.txt extry that blocks access to their comments.

    They’d have to do it across the board, or it won’t do any good. Spammers have to know that all MT users don’t get their comments listed in google. No point doing it yourself since the spammers will just assume you’re another MT user.

    I wouldn’t recommend switching to Haloscan. It’s a great service for poeple that don’t have comments built in, but it does go down about once a week really slowing down your web page loading.

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