File Under 'Perplexing... and Yet Strangely Exciting'

March 25, 2004

File Under ‘Perplexing… and Yet Strangely Exciting’

I was talking to a co-worker this morning — a reserved, straight-laced, no-nonsense co-worker — about a project that we’re having trouble getting off the ground. And near the end of the conversation, she looked me straight in the eye, and said this to me, without a hint of irony or miscief:

‘Well, we’d better just stop pussyfooting around and do it, then.‘

Now, how the hell is a guy like me supposed to respond to that? I honestly don’t know, and so I didn’t, at first. I ran through the first few reactions that came to mind, like Ahhnold in Terminator:

snorty giggling
‘Well, I guess we should, you little vixen! *rrrawwwrr*‘
‘Hey, I wanted to talk about the project, but sure — meet you in the broom closet in ten minutes. Come alone. No, wait! Bring the secretary, too.‘
‘Well, I never! You cheeky tramp! Harrumph!‘
‘Huh huh. Huh. You said, ‘pussyfoot’.

Somehow, none of these seemed appropriate. Meanwhile, she patiently stood there, waiting for a response. No doubt she was intrigued by the various emotions that flickered across my face as I considered the options above.

(‘Intrigued’, ‘disgusted’, ‘enhornied’… whatever. Eight of one, half dozen of the other, right?)

Anyway, I finally managed a weak nod and got the hell out of there. And then locked myself in my office and had a nice little giggle. That was a close one, folks. Sometimes, it’s hard being the office smartass, you know?

(Heh. I said, ‘hard‘. Ah, good times. Good times.)