The Scene: My office building, just outside the cafeteria.
The Crime: My boss, cradling his lunch, a muffin, and a Coke, reached the door to the hallway just as I, holding a plate of pizza, did. Unable to easily open the door himself, he said:
‘I’m going to have to rely on the kindness of your one free hand.‘
Unable to easily stop myself from being a smartass (but still opening the door for him), I said:
‘Sir, if that means what I think it means, you’ll be waiting a very long time.‘
The Punishment: Who knows? He probably didn’t even get the joke, thank goodness. And now I’m really happy I didn’t go with:
‘I bet you say that to all the guys, sir.‘
How I stay gainfully employed is a mystery,
even especially to me.