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Charlie Hatton
Brookline, MA
« Lifestyles of the Poor and Fatuous | Main | No Thanks for the Memories »
Well, that was quite a weekend. First, dinner on Friday night with the gracious and entertaining Elisson, and the family d'Elisson -- and without any of them smacking me, even. That's success, people.
And then last night, I walked into the middle of an Elks Lodge in Connecticut -- don't try this at home, folks -- and talked for fifteen minutes. Just talked. And got some laughs, and even a little applause at the end. And again -- no smacking! And I get paid for this one! What a country.
And then -- then! -- today, I happened to catch Office Space on cable. Which I've seen many times before, of course -- spectacular fucking movie -- but today, it taught me something. Did you know that on cable, they bleep 'fudgepackers', but not 'assclown'? That's valuable shit, folks -- hell, I'm reworking my whole standup routine, just in case Comedy Central ever calls. Now, I just need to find out about 'douchebag' -- that's the one that could put me over the top, baby.
You know, I learned something else this weekend, too -- it even ties into something Elisson and I were talking about on Friday night. He mentioned that there's a certain set of terms that make up a 'blogging dictionary' -- you know, the sort of things that you'd only see on a weblog. Stuff like, I don't know, 'douchebaggery', 'crapmongering', and... oh, hell, just look at any of my posts. There's shit in all of them that nobody in their right mind would ever print or say anywhere else. Even on a weblog, probably. My douchebaggery is in a class all by itself, it seems.
Anyway, blogs or not, there are certain terms that I always thought were confined to Internet-speak. But I heard one of them on the way out of work on Friday night. I was taking off, on my way to the mini-blogmeet with Elisson, and shared the elevator with another guy from the office. And on the way out, he said to me:
'Laters.'
Yes, definitely 'laters -- with the 's'. 'Later', I say all the time. This was plural, no question. It may have even been 'l8rs'; I couldn't really tell. I'm not a very good lip-reader, apparently.
Either way, do people really say that? Online, sure -- we're all morons online, once in a while. But 'laters'? In person, to a co-worker? I almost LMAO'ed.
No. No, I didn't. And I feel dirty even typing it out. I'm sticking to 'douchebaggery'. And let's leave the 'l8rs' to the script kiddies, shall we? I'm too old for this crapmongering.
It's never a good idea to point out your buttons.
People, myself sometimes included, get too much
fun pushing them. ...laters
And what's with people saying "prolly" instead of "probably"?? That drives me fucking batshit.
Hey...only 2 more hours left to comment on my blog and help the greyhounds! C'mon down!!
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Laters?
Hell, that ain't blogspeak - that's Hawaiian pidgin. I've been usin' dat one fo' years.
We had a great time meeting you, Charlie. Not a trace of douchebaggery to be seen. You are always welcome at Chez Elisson if you should find yourself down Souf.
Laters. (Heh.)