Better Late Than Fever [Where the Hell Was I?]

December 28, 2004

Better Late Than Fever

Well, dammit.

With all of the... 'festivities' and whatnot -- and trust me, folks, it's almost completely 'whatnot' -- I completely spaced on the Punchline Fever entry for this week. Damn this Christmas bullshit! Damn it severely!

Still, even though it's not Monday any more -- which is the traditional Punchline Fever day, at least for the past month or so -- I can still swoop in belatedly and leave you a little fever in your holiday stockings. So that's what I'm gonna do. Just try and stop me. You can't. Sucka.

So, first, let's review the less-than-official Punchline Fever rules, shall we? Yes. Yes, we shall:

1) I'll sit around, day and night, thinking of a short but flexible setup for a joke.
B) I'll post the best setup I can think of, but with a blank where the punchline should go.
iii) Then it's up to you to come up with your best line, and leave it in the comments, for all to snicker over.

Okay, so we're caught up there. And I've got to spring out of bed early tomorrow for more positively scrumptious holiday travel, so let's cut to the chase here:

Punchline Fever #25:

'Janet tried and tried to return the vibrator she'd received as a Christmas present back to the store where it was bought. But in the end (no pun intended), the store said that it simply couldn't accept returned merchandise that _________________________.'

There you have it, boys and girls. Naughty or nice, we can all have a good chuckle to combat our crippling post-Christmas depression. Though, frankly -- it kind of helps if you're naughty. I'm just saying.

Anyway, this might be the last you hear from me until I'm safe and snug and content back in my house in Boston. So keep yourselves busy in the archives, or check out the main Punchline Fever page for more setup-punchline yuks. And try not to miss me too much. I'll be back soon. Merry Monday-that-isn't-really-Monday-any-more!

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Posted by Charlie on December 28, 2004 | Email Me

Comments

'...had been taken out of the box...
...and put into the box...
...and taken out of the box...
...and put into the box...
...and then put back into the box.'

Posted by: Charlie | December 29, 2004 12:23 AM

...that had already been washed and worn.

Posted by: the mad sister | December 29, 2004 4:15 PM

...Had a fine candy coating
...Smelled a bit fishy
...Had Jaws of Life dents

Sorry Charlie, I got nothing!
Lois Lane

Posted by: Lois Lane | December 29, 2004 6:24 PM

....wasn't purchased at this, or any other, Wal-Mart.

Posted by: Puffin | December 30, 2004 1:17 PM

...was scorched and holding up its own white 'surrender' flag.

Posted by: toni | December 31, 2004 1:46 AM

um... i can't help you with a punchline...
i just dropped by to wish you a happy new year.

Posted by: susan | December 31, 2004 6:00 PM