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A Battle of Two Half-Wits

I had some time to kill tonight (technically last night now, but who’s clock-watching at this hour, anyway?), so I decided to read a bit.

Unfortunately, the book closest to me at the time was the one that one of my (several) bosses at work gave me a couple of weeks ago. It has something to do with business, I think, and possibly management philosophy, or team-building, or some other such thing. Some part of my brain told me that if I was going to read tonight, I should really conquer a few pages in this book, so I could get it back to her soon.

That same part of my brain tucked the book under my arm, and walked me upstairs, intent on tucking me into bed with said book to peruse a few chapters before sleepytime. This was at around eleven thirty, soon after I’d finished my last post.

This was also the point at which the rest of my brain finally broke through the barricade and overpowered the part of my brain that had been doing all this ‘responsible thinking’ crap. Just at the last moment, my newly-empowered neurons detoured me to the office, where instead of reading, I read blogs, and made a few comments, and uploaded two standup clips.

Unfortunately, that rogue ‘responsible’ part of my brain was still kicking and screaming, fighting for control. Several times, I even looked at the book on my desk, wondering whether I shouldn’t take it to bed — or at least the bathroom — and try out a few pages. Each time, the rest of my brain intervened, and I went back, grinning and drooling, to my online entertainment.

Eventually, my in-charge brain told me, the ‘other’ half would be subdued, beaten into submission through inertia and the inexorable passage of time. It would return eventually, of course, but there was nothing that said I had to succumb to its sober realities and soul-rending obligations tonight. If we just stick together, my half-brain told me, we can beat this thing. Sooner or later, the will to start that book tonight will fade, if we just distract ourselves into exhaustion.

Well, I’m happy to say that three hours later, I’ve finally lost that urge. It may be two-thirty in the morning, and I may have to get up way before I’m ready to in the morning, but dammit, I hung tight with my half a brain, and I beat this thing. No book, no reading, and now I’m off to bed. Victory is mine! Well, half mine, anyway. And pretty soon, my boss is gonna ask about that damned book, too. Shit.

Man, my other half a brain is gonna kill me tomorrow when it wakes up!