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Charlie Hatton
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Howdy, friendly reading person!
I'm on a bit of a hiatus right now, but only to work on other projects -- one incredibly exciting example being the newly-released kids' science book series Things That Make You Go Yuck!
If you're a science and/or silliness fan, give it a gander! See you soon!

Maybe It’s the Cologne I Was Wearing?

Hmmm. Well, I’m not sure what to make of this, frankly.

You see, I wrote a post yesterday, and I’ve found that it’s gotten many more comments than my usual daily dose of drivel. And now, I’m trying to figure out why. I want to know what’s unique about that entry, so I can recreate that magic, when I’m in the mood for user feedback.

(Which is always, by the way. I’m a needy little bastard, you know. It’s always about me. Just like a man, eh?)

Anyway, here’s what I can figure out that might set yesterday’s post apart:

1. It was short, at least by my standards.

B. It was posted mid-afternoon, when people are looking for something to do at work.

iii. It was basically one big poopie joke.

Which leaves me in a bit of a quandary, of course. None of the options are good. First of all, it’s not exactly heartwarming to consider the possibility that the less I write, the more interested people are in chiming in.

(It’s realistic, perhaps. Reasonable, even. And quite probably predictable. But that doesn’t make it ‘heartwarming’, dammit.)

I’m also not likely to be laying down many entries at three in the afternoon. Much as I’d like to, of course. But the more often I tear myself away from my ‘day job’ to feed this monster, the greater the chance that somebody will snatch said job away. And I use that salary to pay for my house, and my internet connection. And my beer. So there’s not gonna be a lot of that nonsense any time soon.

And finally, there’s the subject matter. Now, I’m pretty sure I don’t have to tell any of you regular readers that I enjoy a good dose of bathroom humor as much as the next guy. Assuming the ‘next guy’ is a filthy pervert, of course.

But I’m not sure I want to slide fully down the proverbial poop chute and turn this into a ‘bodily fluids blog’. So, I do my best to sprinkle other topics in between the bits about ‘wee-wee‘ and ‘number two‘. Apparently, nobody’s terribly interested in that other crap, but that’s just how it is. Since when was anything as compelling as a good trip to the bathroom?

(Except maybe the searches that have been most popular around here recently, having to do with ‘beach volleyball wedgies’ and Holly McPeak and/or Misty May in various states of lubed-upness. Damn. And I thought I was the big perv around here.

I guess it has something to do with my post about volleyball, back in February. I did get a bit carried away, now that I reread it. But lucky me for accidentally getting something Olympic-topical into the search engines a few months in advance, eh?

I always knew something good would come from being a damned dirty old man. Heh.)

Anyway, I just thought I’d mention that last post. And I thought I’d take this chance to thank all of you who’ve been reading, and linking, and yes, even commenting. Even if you only dig the poop jokes. And don’t worry — I’m sure there’ll be plenty more of those. You gotta do what you’re best at.

In the meantime, I suppose there’s only one thing I can say for sure — there aren’t gonna be very damned many comments on this post. After all, it’s not short. It’s being posted late at night. And there’s barely any bathroom humor at all.

Jeez. Never let it be said that I give the people what they want around here, eh? I might as well write frigging haikus and call it a night. Or hey, even better — I’ll forget the stupid poetry, and go straight to signing off. Now there’s something about this entry we can all appreciate. G’night, folks!

Permalink  |  9 Comments



9 Responses to “Maybe It’s the Cologne I Was Wearing?”

  1. pickwick says:

    hehe – I suddenly realise that ‘crapulence’ in the blogtionary has more kudos than I ever imagined…

    ta!

  2. hilary says:

    i dunno about the other ten comments, but i can explain mine. your site happened to pop up on my blogsnob ad yesterday. i liked the ad so i clicked it and voila! a post about poop.

    so i commented, then added you to my reads list. :D

    it had nothing to do with poop though, i swear!

  3. Elizabeth says:

    Well, first of all – it was just about the most disgustingly honest thing I’d read ALL DAY.

    (hee – not the most disgustingly honest thing I’d seen tho. I live with a preschooler. Boogers are his recent fascination)

    I’m all about applauding the bodily functions. SOme of my favorite things include bodily functions.

    Also, I’d just found this site and wanted to say HI!!!

    Look. I gushed. I posted. All while packing and running around like a chicken with my head cut off.

    Feeling the love?

  4. zann says:

    well, it’s because you posed a question, and we had to answer! plus, yeah, it’s about poop :)

    besides, your longer posts usually say all there is to say, so all there is to comment would be “yeah!” or “that’s funny and whatnot” or “right on, bro.” nice comments, yes, but people are more motivated to comment if they can add their two cents or disagree instead.

  5. Dawn says:

    Oh, yes, frigging haikus!! I love ’em!!

    Haikus about poop? Even better!!

  6. CC says:

    I just don’t know a single woman who doesn’t do anything they possibly can to reduce the number on the scale, that’s all.

  7. Deanna says:

    I don’t like reading about that kind of crap… it means shit to me…or is it… means Greek to me.. what are we talking about here anyways. HA! It’s all about energy in and energy out really. Too much energy weighs you down… can’t bump and spike with power and determination… if you have relieved yourself of that energy…. it definitely puts some pep in your step… all depends on what you want to do with your day !

  8. steph says:

    you are a damn long read, and i have a damn intense job. keep at it. i love every second of it.

  9. Monkey says:

    It’s poo. Back in the days of my blog, the posts about boobs or poo would get the most comments by far. Yep, nothing like poo to get people coming out of the woodwork.

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