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Charlie Hatton
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Howdy, friendly reading person!
I'm on a bit of a hiatus right now, but only to work on other projects -- one incredibly exciting example being the newly-released kids' science book series Things That Make You Go Yuck!
If you're a science and/or silliness fan, give it a gander! See you soon!

Man, This Year is Gonna Be Hard

Well. This is sort of a kick in the hoohah.

(Assuming I actually have a ‘hoohah’, of course. Different people use the term to refer to different anatomical features. In some systems, I don’t have a hoohah. In others, I might have a pair. And in some, I’m pretty sure I am a hoohah. Feel free to substitute your favorite male genital euphemism, if ‘hoohah’ doesn’t apply for you.)

Anyway, this is a big fist crammed up the wazoo. Um, so to speak, euphemistically. You know what I’m saying.

Look, the point is that this post officially begins the third year of this demented little weblog of mine… and I’ve got no topic. Nothing. No plan, no outline, no color-coded diagrams written on note cards and organized in one of those little metal boxes. Nothing at all. So, let’s see where this goes.

The wife and I are thinking about taking a long weekend in a couple of months. We thought we’d drive around, maybe take in a couple of baseball games, visit some friends — that sort of thing. And I’ve found, in trying to set up an itererary… that I just suck at geography.

Now, I sort of knew this already. I have a pretty good idea of where things are, once I’m familiar with a particular area — but places I’ve never seen before? No clue. Like Nicaragua, for instance. It sounds so exotic — Nicarrrrragua. They tell me it’s in Central America. Interesting. I always thought it was near… well, the clitoris, actually.

(Which would be just a short hop from Grundlevania, as most of you know. Of course, you can’t get directly from one to the other; you’d have to take a ‘puddle jumper’. But you knew that already. Or you just spewed coffee onto your monitor, one or the other.)

Anyhow, now I’m finding out how far Boston is from interesting places like Baltimore and Philadelphia. And those Rand-McNally bastards make it seem like not very far — just a couple of inches on the map — but it’ll still take hours to drive there. More hours than a baseball game, even. Now that’s far.

Should be a fun trip, though. And another chance to work on that ass indentation I’ve been cultivating in the driver’s seat in the car. A few hours behind the wheel ought to permanently cement that thing into a perfect heinie shape. Which is nice. Maybe now I can stop carrying the couch cushion out to the car when I want to take a trip. Hey, you can never be too comfortable.

At any rate, I think that’s all for tonight. I’ve got a presentation to give at work tomorrow — which should provide lots of self-deprecating material for you folks — so I’m going to get some shuteye. Can’t screw up my talk and get chewed out on anything less than a full nights’ sleep, now, can I? G’night, now.

Permalink  |  6 Comments



6 Responses to “Man, This Year is Gonna Be Hard

  1. zoot says:

    “Nicarrrrragua. They tell me it’s in Central America. Interesting. I always thought it was near… well, the clitoris, actually.”………..

    not coffee……cheerios…..

    great start to a Monday morning.. thanks Charlie!

  2. MemosToSelf says:

    Ummmm….actually, you may suck at geography, but I got stuck teaching an American Public Policy class this last semester…and my very first “Current Events Monday”…where the students bring in newspaper clips of important events in daily history…caused me to blunder in a full page Marshal Fields ad….13 HOUR SALE…(Full page, did I accentuate that???) “Hey guys, do not miss this one!” I am inept at that kinda crap…and in front of a crowd….at least you are just inept in front of your wife!!!!

  3. wildcat says:

    funny stuff, charlie…have fun!

  4. #Debi says:

    Happy blogiversary! I’m about to start my fourth year in a couple of weeks–geez, ya think I should get a hobby or something? Have a great trip wherever you end up…

  5. Kittierine says:

    TEH PUDDLE JUMPER!!! I woudl SO be confused if I had no idea what oyu are talking about!!! Does this mean my favie blogger Likes Stargate, too? ke ke ke… and dont worry, I failed geography in grammar school…

  6. Kittierine says:

    TEH PUDDLE JUMPER!!! I woudl SO be confused if I had no idea what oyu are talking about!!! Does this mean my favie blogger Likes Stargate, too? ke ke ke… and dont worry, I failed geography in grammar school…

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